Prayer Of The Flesh VS. Heavenly
The Works and Prayers of the Flesh Vs. Heavenly
The sentiment that human nature is prone to sin and distracted from a heavenly focus is a core concept in Christian theology. This struggle between a person’s spiritual self and their earthly, or “fleshly,” desires is a consistent theme throughout the Bible. The guidance to pray in a “secret place” is a direct biblical instruction that addresses this very problem of distraction.
The power of the flesh versus a heavenly focus
The internal conflict: The apostle Paul writes extensively about the conflict between the “flesh” and the “Spirit”. The “flesh” represents our natural, fallen, and worldly desires, which are inherently opposed to God’s will. In contrast, the Spirit represents the new nature believers receive through faith in Christ. This creates an ongoing spiritual battle within every Christian as long as they are on earth.
The weakness of the flesh: When Jesus told his disciples, “The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak,” he acknowledged the human tendency to give in to temptation, even with good intentions. This weakness pulls people toward materialism, pride, and other worldly pleasures, which demagnetize their heavenly focus by prioritizing temporary satisfaction over eternal life.
Human righteousness is insufficient: From a biblical perspective, the good deeds of a sinful person cannot outweigh or balance their bad deeds. The prophet Isaiah described all human righteousness as “filthy rags” before a perfectly holy God. Therefore, the path to righteousness is not through a scale of good versus bad, but through God’s grace and forgiveness.
The purpose of the “secret place”
Jesus’s instruction to pray in private is found in the Sermon on the Mount: “But when you pray, go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father, who is unseen” (Matthew 6:6).
This teaching serves several key functions:
To avoid hypocrisy: Jesus explicitly warns against praying publicly just to be seen and praised by others, calling this behavior hypocritical. By going into a private space, the focus of prayer shifts entirely from human approval to genuine worship of God.
To eliminate distraction: A secret place removes the noise of the world, including daily anxieties, worldly desires, and the influence of other people. This creates an environment where a person can devote their full attention to communicating with God without being pulled away by the flesh.
To foster intimacy with God: Praying privately is an act of intimate communion. It establishes a personal, one-on-one relationship with the “Father, who sees what is done in secret”. This private space allows for honest, unburdened communication and a deeper connection that is crucial for spiritual growth.
To strengthen spiritual focus: The discipline of regular, private prayer strengthens the spirit over the flesh. It is a time for focusing one’s mind “on things above, not on earthly things,” as commanded in Colossians 3:2. This practice empowers believers to resist temptation and walk according to the Spirit, rather than the flesh.
############ Secret Place ##############
For many, the “secret place” with God can feel routine or dull over time. The key to keeping it fresh and engaging is to move beyond simply talking at God and instead focus on cultivating a two-way relationship through a variety of practices.
Incorporate all the senses
Your secret place can be more than just a quiet time; it can be a multi-sensory experience that helps you focus on God.
Visual: If possible, change your location. Move from your bedroom to a quiet spot in your yard or a local park. If you stay inside, light a candle or adjust the lighting to be more inviting. You can also use pictures of family or a “prayer board” to visually guide your prayers.
Auditory: Play instrumental or worship music softly in the background to set the atmosphere and help your mind center on God.
Tactile: Use a journal to write down your prayers, doodle, or draw. Underline passages in your Bible as you read to stay focused and engaged.
Olfactory: Diffuse essential oils or light a scented candle to create a calming and consistent environment.
Transform your Bible reading
Instead of just reading and rushing through a passage, use a method that encourages deeper engagement.
Pray the scriptures: Use a passage from the Bible as the basis for your prayer. As you read through a Psalm or a prayer from Paul, turn the words into your own requests, confessions, or praise.
Use the S.O.A.P. method: This stands for Scripture, Observation, Application, and Prayer.
Scripture: Write down the verses you are studying.
Observation: Note what stands out to you in the text.
Application: Ask how the passage applies to your life.
Prayer: Write out a prayer based on what you have learned.
Listen actively: As prayer is a conversation, dedicate time in your study to simply be silent and listen. After reading a passage, sit still for a few minutes and ask God if he has anything to say to you.
Shake up the routine
Sometimes the boredom comes from doing the same thing in the same way every day.
Change your position: Try kneeling, walking, or even standing with your hands open. Engaging your body can help re-engage your mind.
Go for a prayer walk: Instead of staying in one place, pray as you walk through your neighborhood, a park, or even your workplace. Pray for the people you see and the places you pass.
Use a prayer list: Organize your prayer list in categories, such as your family, church leaders, or ministries. Using an app can help keep track of your requests and mark when they are answered, which can be very encouraging.
Pray bold and specific prayers: A relationship is built on open and honest communication. Don’t be afraid to ask God for bold and specific things. The more specific your requests, the more obvious his answers will be.
Address the spiritual side of distraction
Acknowledge that distraction can be a spiritual battle, and don’t feel ashamed when it happens.
Confess the struggle: When you are feeling distracted, talk to God about it. Admit that you are having a hard time focusing and ask for his help.
Start small: If you feel overwhelmed, don’t set a goal for a full hour. Start with a committed 10–15 minutes and gradually work your way up. Consistency is more important than length.
Embrace the wandering thoughts: Instead of fighting every stray thought, try inviting God into it. Use it as a prompt to pray for that person or situation, then turn your focus back to God.
############## Spiritual Dryness #############
Spiritual dryness in prayer is a common struggle that does not reflect a lack of worth or faith. The feeling of disconnection can feel discouraging, but you can overcome it by reframing your prayer life and practicing new disciplines.
Reframe your expectations
Focus on faith, not feelings. Your faith is based on God’s unchanging truth and character, not your fleeting emotions. A dry spell might be a chance for God to teach you to rely on him alone, rather than on spiritual “consolations” or feelings of joy.
Understand it’s a season, not a sentence. Acknowledge that spiritual dryness happens to everyone, even some of the most faithful people in scripture, like King David. Seeing it as a temporary phase of growth can change your perspective and help you persevere.
Be honest about your struggles. Pour your heart out to God, telling him exactly how you feel. Expressing your frustrations and desires can open the door to a breakthrough.
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Vary your prayer practice
Pray the scriptures. If you feel like you don’t have the words, let God’s Word do the talking. Praying a psalm or scripture passage directly back to God can re-engage your heart and remind you of his promises.
Get moving. If sitting still feels stagnant, try an active form of prayer. A “prayer walk” around your neighborhood or in nature can help you feel more connected to creation and less confined in your thoughts.
Engage your senses. Light a candle, play worship music, or use a tactile prayer item to focus your attention. A multi-sensory approach can help draw your wandering mind back to God.
Examine for potential blocks
Confess unacknowledged sin. Sometimes, unconfessed or habitual sin can act as a barrier to intimacy with God. A heart examination that leads to confession and repentance can clear the way for reconnection.
Address potential physical factors. Before jumping to spiritual conclusions, consider your physical state. Fatigue, stress, poor diet, and a lack of sleep can all affect your spiritual energy. Sometimes, the most spiritual thing you can do is take care of your body.
Stay connected to community
Fight isolation with fellowship. Isolation often feeds spiritual dryness. Talk to a trusted Christian friend, mentor, or pastor about your feelings. Sharing your struggle can provide encouragement and accountability.
Attend church, even if you don’t feel like it. Engaging in corporate worship and fellowship can keep the channels of God’s grace open, even when your personal devotional time feels unfulfilling.
Serve others. Shifting your focus from your own spiritual state to the needs of others can be a powerful way to rekindle your passion. Serving others reflects the heart of Jesus and can bring unexpected moments of connection with God.
Trust and persevere
Wait patiently. Trust that God is working in ways you can’t yet see. Continue to seek him even when you don’t feel his presence, believing the biblical promise that when you draw near to God, he will draw near to you.
Believe in his faithfulness. Remind yourself of all the ways God has been faithful in the past. This act of remembrance can bridge the emotional gap you feel and bring renewed hope.
############ Pastoral Prayer ###############
There are many ways to pray the scriptures, ranging from using the Bible as a conversation guide to letting it inform your specific requests. The following are practical examples for different scenarios.
Using the Psalms as your prayer book
The Psalms are a natural place to start, as they were written as songs and prayers to God that express the full range of human emotions.
Praise and adoration: Read and pray Psalm 145 to start your day with gratitude.
Scripture: “I will extol you, my God and King, and bless your name forever and ever” (v. 1).
Prayer: Heavenly Father, I extol you as my King and praise your name forever. You are worthy of all my praise and devotion.
Lament and distress: When you feel overwhelmed, use a psalm of lament like Psalm 13 to guide your prayer.
Scripture: “How long, O Lord? Will you forget me forever? How long will you hide your face from me?” (v. 1).
Prayer: God, my heart is heavy today, and I feel abandoned and forgotten. Lord, how long until you answer me? I feel lost without your presence.
Thanksgiving: When you want to thank God, use a psalm like Psalm 107.
Scripture: “Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good; his love endures forever” (v. 1).
Prayer: Thank you, Lord, for your goodness and your everlasting love. Your faithfulness lasts forever.
Using the letters of Paul for intercession
Paul’s letters offer prayers that can be used for yourself, family, or church.
Praying Ephesians 3:17–19 can help you pray for a deeper understanding of God’s love. You can find the full scripture and an example prayer in the source documents.
Colossians 1:9–10 can be used to pray for knowledge of God’s will. The full scripture and an example prayer are available in the source document.
Personalizing a promise or command
Turn a verse with a promise or command into a personal prayer.
Philippians 4:6–7 offers guidance for prayer when feeling anxious and can be used as a prayer of surrender. You can find the full scripture and an example prayer in the source documents.
Joshua 1:9 is a promise of God’s presence and can be used as a prayer for courage. The full scripture and an example prayer are available in the source documents.
Using the Lord’s Prayer as a model
Jesus provided a prayer model in Matthew 6:9–13 that you can adapt using your own words. The source documents provide the different parts of the prayer and suggestions for how to pray each part.
###############
Some common misconceptions about prayer include viewing it as a transactional exchange, a last resort, or a formulaic ritual. Clarifying these misunderstandings can help deepen your relationship with God.
Misconception: Prayer is a transactional process
Many people mistakenly believe prayer is a “cosmic vending machine” where if they do good things, say the right words, or pray hard enough, God is obligated to give them what they want.
Truth: Prayer is not about getting what you want, but about aligning your will with God’s will and deepening your relationship with him. The focus shifts from a wish list to fostering connection and seeking God’s wisdom.
Misconception: Prayer is a last resort
Another common misunderstanding is that prayer should only be used in emergencies when all other options have been exhausted.
Truth: Prayer is meant to be a constant and regular practice throughout all aspects of life, not just for times of crisis. It should be your “steering wheel,” not your “spare tire”.
Misconception: Unanswered prayers mean God isn’t listening
When requests go seemingly unanswered, people may feel ignored or believe God is not listening to them.
Truth: God hears all prayers, but his response may be “yes,” “no,” or “wait”. An unanswered prayer may be an invitation to trust God’s bigger picture, or it may reveal that a person’s motives are selfish.
Misconception: Prayer requires perfect words and formality
Some believe that prayer must be a formal, eloquent presentation using specific words and rituals to be effective.
Truth: God values sincerity and honesty over formality and perfect phrasing. Jesus taught his followers to pray simply and genuinely, noting that God already knows what we need. The Holy Spirit also helps us pray when we can’t find the right words.
Misconception: Prayer is easy
While prayer can feel easy and comforting at times, it is not always effortless and can be a struggle.
Truth: Prayer is a practice that must be learned and nurtured, not an innate skill. Paul’s encouragement to “pray without ceasing” demonstrates that it is a discipline to be practiced.
Misconception: Prayer’s power comes from the person praying
Some people believe that their own righteousness or spiritual status makes their prayers more powerful.
Truth: The power in prayer comes from the God who hears and answers it, not from the person praying. We approach God through Christ’s righteousness, not our own. This is an encouraging reminder that even small, humble prayers are heard and can be effective.
Misconception: Prayer is only talking to God
The idea that prayer is a one-way communication of requests and desires is a limited view.
Truth: Prayer is a two-way conversation that includes listening to God. It is an interaction where we can speak to God and also hear from him, whether through scripture, a quiet moment, or through the voice of the Holy Spirit.
############Hearing God’s Voice#############
Distinguishing God’s voice from your own thoughts in prayer is a common challenge for many people. Discernment comes from developing an intimate relationship with God, allowing you to recognize the Spirit’s unique characteristics over time.
Here are several ways to practice discernment during prayer.
Test against scripture: The most reliable and definitive way to test a thought or impression is by holding it up against the Bible.
Higher authority: God will never contradict the truth he has already revealed in Scripture. If a thought tells you to do something that violates a biblical command or principle, it is not from God. For example, a thought urging you to lie or be dishonest is not God’s voice.
Build your knowledge: To use this test effectively, you must be well-acquainted with Scripture. Regularly reading and studying the Bible will familiarize you with God’s character and his established ways of working in the world.
############Voice’s Characteristics###########
The nature of the thought or impression is often a key indicator of its origin.
Source of peace vs. anxiety: The Holy Spirit’s promptings bring a deep, settled peace, even if they challenge you to step out of your comfort zone. In contrast, thoughts from your own worry or the enemy often produce fear, anxiety, pressure, or condemnation.
Calm guidance vs. frantic compulsion: God’s voice is typically gentle, patient, and still—a “still, small voice”. The enemy or your fleshly desires, however, can be pushy, chaotic, and insistent, making you feel you must act now.
Conviction vs. condemnation: The Holy Spirit convicts you of sin, prompting humble confession and repentance. This conviction is full of hope and leads to restoration. The enemy, in contrast, uses condemnation and shame to paralyze you with feelings of worthlessness.
############Consider the Fruit##############
You can judge the source of a thought by looking at the outcome it produces.
The fruit of the Spirit: A word from God will bear good fruit in your life and the lives of others, aligning with the “fruit of the Spirit”: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control (Galatians 5:22-23).
Greater love and service: God’s guidance always leads you toward becoming more like Jesus. It moves you toward greater humility, love, and service to others, not toward self-serving or prideful actions.
##########Practice Spiritual Disciplines#########
Actively engaging in spiritual practices can sharpen your spiritual senses over time.
Cultivate stillness: In a loud world full of distractions, you must create space for quiet and silence. The more you quiet your mind and spend time listening, the more you will be able to distinguish God’s voice from other noise.
Seek wise counsel: Discuss your thoughts with mature, trusted Christian friends, a mentor, or a pastor. Others can often provide objective perspective and help you avoid misinterpreting a message through the filter of your own desires or fears.
Patience and repetition: God is patient with us. Sometimes a message from God will have a repetitive nature, reappearing until you are ready to receive and act on it. Instead of forcing a conclusion, pray over the thought and test it over time. Emotional feelings can be fleeting, but God’s peace endures.
###############Discerning the Spirit#########
Distinguishing between thoughts that might not be from God and those that are is a key aspect of spiritual discernment. A thought not from God typically contradicts Scripture, attacks your identity, promotes selfish desires, or creates chaos and fear.
Here are specific examples of thoughts that likely do not originate from God, categorized by their source.
From your sinful nature (the “flesh”)
These thoughts often appeal to your pride, comfort, or worldly desires.
Selfish ambition: “If you want that promotion, you’ll need to make your rival look bad.” This thought contradicts God’s command to love your neighbor and elevates personal gain over integrity.
Rationalizing sin: “It’s okay to do this just one time; God will understand and forgive you later.” This thought contradicts the seriousness of sin and presumes upon God’s grace without true repentance.
Prioritizing comfort: “You’re too tired to help with that church project; you’ve earned a break.” While rest is biblical, this thought is a temptation toward laziness and discourages selfless service.
Trivializing God’s guidance: “The Lord told me to go to this specific grocery store and buy a certain brand of lettuce.” This is often a self-centered justification for personal preferences, not a divine revelation.
How to Know If a Thought Is From God, the Devil, or Yourself
From the enemy (Satan)
The enemy seeks to accuse, condemn, and discourage you.
Condemnation: “You’re a worthless failure. God is disgusted with you for making that mistake.” This is different from the Holy Spirit’s conviction, which is specific and offers hope for repentance. Condemnation focuses on your identity as a sinner, while conviction focuses on the specific sin.
Intrusive, blasphemous thoughts: These are unwanted and often disturbing thoughts or images that attack God, Jesus, or the Holy Spirit. They are distressing and may lead you to question your salvation or spiritual sanity.
Intimidation and fear: “If you take this step of faith, something terrible will happen.” God’s voice brings peace, while the enemy’s voice brings paralyzing fear and anxiety.
Hopelessness and despair: “You’ll never change. You’ll never be free from this sin.” This lie is designed to make you feel there is no purpose in resisting sin, separating you from God’s promise of victory through Christ.
Mental or Emotional Distress
These thoughts are often intrusive, repetitive, and anxiety-inducing, and should be addressed both spiritually and practically.
Repetitive shame: “Stupid, stupid, stupid!” This thought pattern comes from an unhealthy mental habit of beating yourself up over mistakes. It is not a call from God to grow, but a cycle of condemnation you should break by renewing your mind with truth.
Anxiety-fueled what-ifs: Thoughts like “What if God is angry with me?” or “Did I accidentally commit the unforgivable sin?” create unnecessary fear and are not aligned with God’s character of love and grace.
Emotional highs and lows: When feelings of anger or excitement drive you toward an impulsive decision, it’s a good sign that your emotion, rather than God’s still, small voice, is leading. The Holy Spirit produces a stable peace, not emotional chaos.
Practical wisdom vs. divine revelation
Not every decision requires divine instruction; some things are left to your own good judgment.
Micro-managing mundane decisions: “The Lord told me to buy the flour tortillas instead of the corn tortillas.” God has given believers wisdom to handle everyday choices without needing special revelation.
Neglecting common sense: Thinking you should stop taking medication for a mental illness based on a “divine sign” would ignore the wisdom of seeking medical care and could be harmful.
How to respond
When you have a thought you suspect is not from God, take the following steps:
Capture it: Acknowledge the thought and identify it.
Test it: Compare it against Scripture, the character of God, and the fruit it produces.
Cast it down: Replace it with a biblical truth. For a condemning thought, you can respond, “There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus” (Romans 8:1).
Seek counsel: If the thoughts are persistent and intrusive, especially if they are disturbing or blasphemous, speak with a trusted spiritual leader or a mental health professional.
######## Struggle between Flesh and Spirit ####
Distinguishing between thoughts that might not be from God and those that are is a key aspect of spiritual discernment. A thought not from God typically contradicts Scripture, attacks your identity, promotes selfish desires, or creates chaos and fear.
Specific examples of thoughts that likely do not originate from God, categorized by their source:
######From your sinful nature (the “flesh”)######
These thoughts often appeal to your pride, comfort, or worldly desires.
Selfish ambition: “If you want that promotion, you’ll need to make your rival look bad.” This thought contradicts God’s command to love your neighbor and elevates personal gain over integrity.
Rationalizing sin: “It’s okay to do this just one time; God will understand and forgive you later.” This thought contradicts the seriousness of sin and presumes upon God’s grace without true repentance.
Prioritizing comfort: “You’re too tired to help with that church project; you’ve earned a break.” While rest is biblical, this thought is a temptation toward laziness and discourages selfless service.
Trivializing God’s guidance: “The Lord told me to go to this specific grocery store and buy a certain brand of lettuce.” This is often a self-centered justification for personal preferences, not a divine revelation.
#########From the enemy (Satan)############
The enemy seeks to accuse, condemn, and discourage you.
Condemnation: “You’re a worthless failure. God is disgusted with you for making that mistake.” This is different from the Holy Spirit’s conviction, which is specific and offers hope for repentance. Condemnation focuses on your identity as a sinner, while conviction focuses on the specific sin.
Intrusive, blasphemous thoughts: These are unwanted and often disturbing thoughts or images that attack God, Jesus, or the Holy Spirit. They are distressing and may lead you to question your salvation or spiritual sanity.
Intimidation and fear: “If you take this step of faith, something terrible will happen.” God’s voice brings peace, while the enemy’s voice brings paralyzing fear and anxiety.
Hopelessness and despair: “You’ll never change. You’ll never be free from this sin.” This lie is designed to make you feel there is no purpose in resisting sin, separating you from God’s promise of victory through Christ.
#######From mental or emotional distress########
These thoughts are often intrusive, repetitive, and anxiety-inducing, and should be addressed both spiritually and practically.
Repetitive shame: “Stupid, stupid, stupid!” This thought pattern comes from an unhealthy mental habit of beating yourself up over mistakes. It is not a call from God to grow, but a cycle of condemnation you should break by renewing your mind with truth.
Anxiety-fueled what-ifs: Thoughts like “What if God is angry with me?” or “Did I accidentally commit the unforgivable sin?” create unnecessary fear and are not aligned with God’s character of love and grace.
Emotional highs and lows: When feelings of anger or excitement drive you toward an impulsive decision, it’s a good sign that your emotion, rather than God’s still, small voice, is leading. The Holy Spirit produces a stable peace, not emotional chaos.
######Practical Wisdom vs. Divine Revelation######
Not every decision requires divine instruction; some things are left to your own good judgment.
Micro-managing mundane decisions: “The Lord told me to buy the flour tortillas instead of the corn tortillas.” God has given believers wisdom to handle everyday choices without needing special revelation.
Neglecting common sense: Thinking you should stop taking medication for a mental illness based on a “divine sign” would ignore the wisdom of seeking medical care and could be harmful.
############How to Respond#############
When you have a thought you suspect is not from God, take the following steps:
Capture it: Acknowledge the thought and identify it.
Test it: Compare it against Scripture, the character of God, and the fruit it produces.
Cast it down: Replace it with a biblical truth. For a condemning thought, you can respond, “There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus” (Romans 8:1).
Seek counsel: If the thoughts are persistent and intrusive, especially if they are disturbing or blasphemous, speak with a trusted spiritual leader or a mental health professional.
###Examples of the Holy Spirit’s specific guidance versus fleshly desires.###
Discerning between the Holy Spirit’s guidance and fleshly desires is a lifelong process for believers. While the Holy Spirit’s promptings align with Scripture and produce positive spiritual fruit, the flesh appeals to selfishness, pride, and worldly comforts.
Specific examples illustrating the difference in various situations:
##########Interacting with others##########
Flesh: When someone cuts you off in traffic, your fleshly desire is to yell insults, honk your horn aggressively, or speed up to get in front of them again, driven by anger and pride.
Holy Spirit: The Holy Spirit’s guidance leads you to respond with grace. You might consciously choose to let it go, pray for the other driver, and allow peace to rule your heart.
#########Responding to offense#############
Flesh: When a friend or family member says something hurtful, your flesh pushes you toward anger, a desire for revenge, or holding a grudge against them. This is driven by self-protection and hurt pride.
Holy Spirit: The Spirit brings conviction that points toward forgiveness, even when it’s difficult. The motivation is to honor God and restore the relationship, not to get even.
#########Handling financial decisions########
Flesh: Your flesh might tell you to keep a recent bonus all to yourself, to buy expensive things you don’t need, or to be stingy when someone asks for help. This is rooted in greed and selfishness.
Holy Spirit: The Holy Spirit prompts generosity and contentment. He may bring someone’s need to your attention and give you a gentle nudge to share a portion of your bonus or to give to a worthy cause.
########Making a career choice###########
Flesh: A desire to seek a high-paying job in a big city is a fleshly desire if the primary motivation is for wealth, status, or to “look bigger” in the eyes of others.
Holy Spirit: Guidance from the Holy Spirit is rooted in your specific calling and gifts. The Spirit may lead you to take a position with less prestige or a lower salary because it aligns with God’s purposes and provides greater opportunity for service.
######Choosing how to spend your time######
Flesh: Your flesh craves idleness and indulgence. It will suggest you spend hours on social media, watch an entire season of a show in one sitting, or pursue only what brings you immediate pleasure.
Holy Spirit: The Spirit encourages you to use your time wisely for eternal purposes. He may gently prompt you to use your spare time to serve others, study Scripture, or spend time in prayer.
########Dealing with your self-image########
Flesh: The flesh thrives on seeking validation from others and finding your identity in your achievements or reputation. It promotes the desire to appear superior or more knowledgeable.
Holy Spirit: The Spirit reminds you that your identity is in Christ. It leads you to humility and gratitude, allowing you to celebrate the success of others without envy or resentment.
###########The ongoing battle###########
The conflict between the flesh and the Spirit is a real and constant struggle for Christians. The key is to consciously choose to follow the Spirit’s leading, even when it is difficult, and to resist the temptations of the flesh. This practice becomes easier over time as you grow in relationship with God.
